SOME HERRING HUMOR

A man who could not marry off his ugly daughter visited Rabbi Shimmel of Cracow. “My heart is heavy,” he told the Rabbi, “because God has given me an ugly daughter.”

“How ugly?” the Seer asked.

“If she were lying on a plate with a herring, you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.”

The Rabbi thought for a long time and finally asked, “What kind of herring?”

The man, taken aback by the query, thought quickly and said, “Er–Bismarck.”

“Too bad,” the Rabbi said. “If it was Maatjes, she’d have a better chance.”

(For those who don't know, the Merriam Webster Dictionary defines Bismarck Herring as: filleted salt herring marinated in wine, vinegar, and spices and served cold with raw onion and lemon)